Professor Amanda Dennis
Amanda Dennis is an assistant professor in the Department of Comparative Literature and English at The American University of Paris. Her Here is her first novel.
Im a professor in the Department of Comparative Literature and English but my specialty is creative writing, which I teach at both introductory and advanced levels. Ive been writing throughout my career, but I started as a philosophy student. I wrote my dissertation on the philosopher Maurice Merleau-Ponty, who was responsible for a movement known as French phenomenology. Hes best known for the idea that the self, or the subject, is not some thinking thing divorced from the world, but is the body itself and the way it interacts with its environment. This semester, Im also teaching about modernism and fragmentation, thinking about the changing relationships that modernist writers like Virginia Woolf, Samuel Beckett, Franz Kafka and Walter Benjamin have to the body.
When I was a postdoctoral fellow in Madrid, I had this revelation: Id been working on a novel all along, and I thought, if Im ever going to finish this, Ive got to do something drastic. I applied to the Iowa Writers Workshop. It was an incredible experience. I learned so much about what it takes to be a writer, to live a life where you do this strange thing every day you consecrate time to worlds that dont exist. Im grateful for and amazed by the things I learned at Iowa, which informed the revisions I later made to the novel.
Her Here is the story of Elena, a woman in her late twenties, trying to find her place in the world. On a research trip to Paris, she meets Siobh獺n, elegant and bizarre, a friend of her late mothers. Elena and Siobh獺n strike up an unusual friendship, and Elena learns that Siobh獺n has lost a daughter, Ella, who disappeared six years earlier. Elena finds herself agreeing to work on the missing girls journals, kept before she went missing in Thailand, in the hope of uncovering where Ella is and why she disappeared. As Elena begins to rewrite the journals, she starts to take on the characteristics of the missing girl. She starts becoming Ella, which is both frightening and invigorating. She soon realises not all was well with Ella.
I was interested in the twenties as a time of life. One of my protagonists is in her early twenties, the other in her late twenties. The twenties are a time when we can ask with urgency, how do I live? We can go on adventures, explore, get a little lost, and try to figure out what were doing on Earth. I was particularly interested in Elenas experience of this space: shes in her late twenties, and shes feeling like shes running out of time. I wanted to capture her sense of searching, but without making the book lag. Theres this negative side to the existential search, because there are no clear answers. In order to make Elena come to life I needed to give her a concrete objective a task she could become obsessed with to the point of losing her identity. Thats where the detective element comes in (Ive written more about that ). But behind the missing person plot are deeper questions about identity and the self. In that sense, the novel is a coming-of-age story.
Each protagonist tells a story in the first person, and their sections are rendered in different fonts. Elena has a particular way of describing what she lives and sees. But Ella has a different voice we only really get her through her journal entries. The tricky bit is actually the novel within the novel, because Elena starts to reconstruct Ellas experiences in Thailand. She creates this new story, which was the hardest part to write, because its a blend of both of voices. It has the vitality and naivety of Ellas journals, but with a more reflective, narrative quality.
Its complicated. I think writing can be survival, but it can also plunge us into places we are probably, for our mental health, better off not going. I think this tension is alive in the book. In a way, writing gives order to things that arent orderable to a certain chaos of sensations and experiences. But I also think there is a danger in writing. In order to write powerfully, you have to go into the eye of the storm. Writing, like so many things, is the poison and the cure. In the case of Elena, whats important for her is the encounter with Ella, the other. Elena can relate in some ways, but ultimately Ella is another person whom Elena cant fully understand. That effort of imagination awakens an energy in Elena. We do that too, as readers: we access another persons intimate experience.
Its important to have a sense of how ones readers will experience things. In a creative writing class, you have this opportunity to have 15 people experience what you have written. Youll learn which parts move people, and youll use that to develop muscle memory. It helps you learn where the vital parts of your writing are. One of the invigorating things about teaching for me is the sense of experimentation and playfulness that students have. Its a gift to be in touch with that its a rewarding, generative experience. When students take a prompt and run with it, sometimes it works and sometimes it doesnt. But keeping that creative imagination alive is an important part of my classes. I aim to stimulate and deepen creativity.